Sooo..

..haha, I'm already neglecting this blog.
I can think of ten times today I thought of something witty and funny to say, but then I get on here and go blankity blank! lol
I'm just going to type randomly and just see what comes out..haha. watch out!
I'm listening to No Air by Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown..and thinking of someone who makes me feel like that. I'm pathetic. I love this song even though it makes my heart feel broken.
I'm waiting on my brother and mom to get home from El Paso. My dad is there. They admitted him tonight. He is going to have a bypass done. I hate this so much, feeling so helpless. Just when we are getting to know each other...I could lose him. Everything in the past is still there, but the thing that was driving us apart...is long gone. Thank God. I know, people live through these things all the time. But, you just never know right? To think of him not being there. Here, with us...as crazy as we make each other, as crazy as he makes ME...if he is not there..my life would not be complete. Despite all the tears I've cried because of all that happened "back then", I know he loves me and I love him too. With my whole heart. All our lives God has always saved us. Our obstacles as a family have been MANY...but we have always pulled through, we have always moved on. I know that God has infinite blessings for us all but, I also know that He does what He has to do, and at some point we all have to move on. I just hope this is not my dad's time to move on. I need him so so much.
Today we had a baby shower for one of our co workers. Made me want a baby..lol. For like five minutes. haha. I want one, but at the same time I know I am not ready! I am not mature enough! lol You know, when I was little, I thought that by the time I was at the age I am now...I would be like, mature or something. Still waiting for that to happen. Good luck to me...
I’ve lost steam..:/ I don’t know how to finish this blog…
The End.